THE LIST! How to decide who gets invited to your Wedding

Planning your wedding is seriously one of the happiest times in your life AND one of the most stressful. For me, it’s been a bit of both. Weddings tend to bring out the best in people and the worst. Oh and not to mention, when vendors hear the word wedding, the jack up their prices by 40%! It’s odd that the same company that would cater a birthday party for 100 guests for a reasonable rate, would be significantly higher when you get a quote for a wedding with 100 guests. Anyway, before I get off track, let’s talk politics and who gets an invitation to your wedding.

This is a tough one because most caterers charge per person and the majority of your budget will go towards the venue and food. This significantly cuts down wondering if you’re going to invite that long lost cousin, his new girlfriend and her 4 kids. On the low end, each guest’s plate is $15, so you could easily spend $90 of people who you’re not really that close to. As you can see, inviting EVERYONE can get out of hand very fast!

I chose to be generous with my list, at first. I asked my mom and my fiancé’s mom for a list of all the relatives that they’d like to invite. I did not put any boundaries on them. My fiancé and I made a list of all of our friends & colleagues and we all began collecting addresses. I noticed the problem started when each guest added a +1 and my mom added people that I’d genuinely never heard of! I had to ask her to stop! LOL! As the Mother of the Bride, she wanted to share her excitement with the mail-lady, her hairdresser and some lady from her aerobics class! I had to do a real live audit and unfortunately remove some people. Look, I value everyone, but when you’re paying per plate, that really helps to put things in perspective.

My fiancé and I sat down, with the list of 300 names and began to figure out who would get a Wedding Announcement and whom we’d actually invite. The 1st to go were those who we knew would be unable to travel to Memphis for the wedding. Then, we were able to eliminate people with whom we did not know at all (most from my mom’s generous list). Finally, we decided to make ours a no kids wedding. Check out more detail on this one here. We’re both so prayerful that his kids (my Step kids) will be there, but I do think guests will understand why their presence is necessary. After some serious discussion, we got our list down to 200 adults. 60 of which have already RSVP’d +1. That’s much better than 300 people with possible +1’s!

I’d advise anyone to get quotes from caterers BEFORE you give your family free reign to invite guests! Heck, start on quotes before you get a headcount in your own mind. You may find that the price difference between 150 and 200 guests is out of your budget. If your parents are contributing to the wedding, then they may have more say-so on decisions….but not too much! Once you check out these CRAZY prices, you will be able to give your mum a specific count in which she can invite and that will prevent a lot of headaches down the line. And remember, you can always JUST SAY NO! Be firm, and plan everything with your wedding day in mind! Don’t let these daily stressors dim the moment and remember to just breathe, when you’re on the dance floor with your new Husband, you won’t be thinking about any of this!

Once you figure out who you want to invite, click here to see how I’m managing my guest list via Google Forms! I swear, it’s the easiest thing in the world!!!

 

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